HOW TO HEAL ANXIETY

So, here we are again...It's that little bug that keeps flying around our head. What bug you ask? Well, I personally like to call it the anxiety bug. You know the one that shows up and because of its very presence you can't function properly. We began to lose focus, obsess and even become fearful of whether this bug might sting us. Oftentimes it die's and we feel somewhat safe to return to our normal functionality, but what happens if this bug keeps coming back? Welp, that's exactly what we are going to talk about today, how to get rid of the anxiety bug.

If you are anything like me you may have been dealing with anxiety not once, not twice but time and time again. The anxiety that we experience can be a lot like playing a game of connect the dots or being an inexperienced hiker trying to climb Mount Everest. Here's what those two things both have in common, it's that they have the power to be completed, but there always seems to be something standing in our way...What is that thing? I will share my personal journey first.

I remember when I was a child, I grew up in what I and most others would consider a toxic environment. What's interesting is that although you're a child you still have a sense of understanding on what's happening around you even though you don't fully comprehend everything you absolutely feel it. I was the kind of child who liked to question things, in fact I did it to such a degree that I was punished as a result. What's funny though is that it never seemed to stop me from being that way, which in reality was me simple being me. I was a child hungry for information and understanding, but I became deprived of those things.

I had so many question's running through my mind, and emotions I didn't know how to handle or what to do with them. So as a result I began feeling like a caged bird wanting to break free, but feeling stuck. I had no real outlet for the things I was dealing with internally, but becoming a teenager really changed things. We all know what it's like to be a teenager and have all of these different variation of feelings and emotion's spiraling through our bodies and we acting out upon them. The thing is, when you never really had someone who could help guide you through your own emotional nature or better yet how to process them your left to your own doing..

During this time, as you can imagine I became quite rebellious. This was due to me not knowing how to deal with things while at the same time needing so badly a way out. There were times when I would develop enough courage to express how I felt, but so often it boiled over negatively. You can even say I developed a sort of fear around expressing myself. It took me many year's to realize this, but over time you start to notice these thing's.

What really did it for me was seeing how much pain it was causing me physically. Oftentimes we push thing's under the rug until one day we trip and fall. We not only fall, but we may even hurt other's. I began noticing that I was playing a game of cat and mouse, but what also hurt me is when I came to the realization that I was playing this game with myself. It takes a lot to be honest with ourselves about these thing's, but you must understand how necessary it is in order to release the anxiety, which I have called a bug.

I not only was playing this game, but I had also at this time began going through the dark night of the soul and thus started my deep inner healing spiritual journey. I mention this because that's how I became aware of what I was ultimately putting myself through and that created a game changer for me.

You see, our ability to bring awareness within the moment is exactly what helps us create a path to work through the anxiety we experience. If you remember earlier when I said anxiety is a lot like playing a game of connect the dots or and inexperienced hiker trying to climb Mount Everest, well that's because in our minds as you can imagine the thoughts, we have seemed to be going from one point to another and another again. So much like the inexperienced hiker about to embark on this journey you can also image that they would be having all sorts of thoughts running ramped as to whether or not they can actually accomplish that thing. There might be one person who say's well how hard can it be and does that thing or the other with ease, but for the person struggling with anxiety the lines and the path become blurred.

One of the most powerful things I learned is that anxiety is closely connected with fear, in fact so much so that you oftentimes will experience them at the same time. What I also became aware of how much my anxiety was completely taking me out of the present moment. I began noticing that anytime I was met with anxiety it was always triggered from either a thought from the past or one that hadn't even occurred yet, hence the (future). I was never truly present.

Once I began noticing my lack of presence due to my anxiety the next thing I started doing was questioning whether or not my thought's were in alignment with the present moment, and if the answer was no then I would redirect my focus to the here and now. Yes I know it sound's easier said than done, but it's not impossible. Let's say it's Sunday and your out having an amazing weekend, but suddenly you realize that you have to go back to work the next day. You began thinking about all of the workload you will have to do and the people you will have to deal with etc. until your thoughts spiral to the point where you are completely dreading going to work the next day. In that moment you have been completely teleported into the future and have left all of the amazing feelings you were having in that moment prior to that initial first thought. If you can become aware within that moment that you are experiencing anxiety you can harness enough energy to then question whether or not the thoughts you are thinking are of the past or future. The answer will likely be yes, and this is where you can allow your awareness to carry you back into the moment. For instance if you are out with loved one's and you are so happy to be in their company, then again allow your awareness to bring you into that feeling as you look at them. You may be sitting down eating when you start experiencing the anxiety, and if so draw your attention to how much you are enjoying the delicious food or maybe your outside somewhere and you start to think of beautiful the sun is shining or how vibrant the tree's are in that moment. It doesn't matter what the scenario is within that moment for you, the point is our ability to tune into anxiety we are experiencing and allow a path to be created where we can allow our conscious awareness to shift us back into the present.

The other thing I started to notice is how much my breath played a major factor in my ability to move through the anxiety I was having, and yes meditation is also apart of the breathing I would do. The thing we must understand about meditation is that we can't truly do so without the power of our breath. I know this because I started doing the breathing exercises long before I got into meditation, and found out just how important combining the two are for me. I want you to know that you don't have to be a master meditator or breathing expert in order to do what you already do everyday unconsciously. There are people who say breath in for this many seconds and out for however long, but what I found is that simple becoming aware of your breath without trying to force it is enough. What I learned is when we experience anxiety, it often manifest somewhere in the body. So even if only for a moment, we take notice. The breath has the power to move energy through the body, and this is of course beneficial due to the pent up energy we can experience while having anxiety, which makes us feel stuck and like we have no grasp on what's taking place inside us. I know it seems difficult, and yes even I have struggled time and time again, but when we can began trusting ourselves and allow our breath to flow into the experience, then consciousness will follow. When you began breathing in deeply (without forcing) the breath will start to move through you and as you exhale you are releasing the pent up energy, and you will feel a difference over time.

Overtime, as I continued working on myself and the anxiety, I was starting to see some improvement's with how I would operate throughout the day. This was good, but what I also started noticing too is the other thing's that would spark my anxiety in the moment. I of course had to battle with those issue's as well, and for a while I did. My awareness grew once I realized how much I was worrying and constantly feeling the need to be accepted. This was also partly due to me caring so much, which as an empath I struggled with too. This awareness alone began taking me on a path of healing parts of my anxiety. I use the word "parts" because healing takes time, and that's why I used the connect-the-dots example earlier. Once you connect one dot there will be another one to connect to and so on, but we must realize that this is how we can start to see the full picture of our life where it makes sense.

I have to say one of the biggest thing's I've realized as well, is not just the fact that I use to worry so much, but more specifically about what. I would worry myself into a borderline panic attack about the future. I would also worry to such a degree as well, due to my unsureness about the future. So, from my own experience and with others is when our mind's are spinning out of control with a million unanswered question's that seem to go on one after the other is enough to make anybody feel like they are going crazy with no grasp on any of it. It always seemed to amaze me at the same time, how much we can torment ourself. What I love about it, is how we can go through such thing's but still manage to survive.

What helped me the most in terms of not worrying about the future and being unsure of it, is when I began asking myself questions like:

How does worrying about the future help me today?

What worry's me the most about the future?

How does worrying work for me or against me rite now? (List them on paper)

If I were to stop worrying about that thing, how might it affect how I feel about the future at that point?

The answer will be different for every person, but when we give ourself an opportunity, that's when we can start to connect-the-dots and began climbing that mountain just as we initially intended.

The last and most important thing that I want you to remember, but before I do is that every individual has at one point in their life experienced anxiety, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with you! We are not always able to pinpoint exactly what is taking place within us at every given moment, but we can give ourself time to get to know ourself on a deeper level in order to discover it. I want you to know that anxiety is something that take's place within the mind, but it can manifest in different ways. I like to look at the mind as water, but in all 3 state's. Those of course being solid, liquid and gas. When you think of a solid, it's held together quit tightly and firmly. The mind can feel just like this, where thing's are put together, it all make's sense, and our feet are planted in the ground so we are feeling that stability. Then their are other time's when the mind feel's like a liquid. This may cause our mind's to feel like we can go with the flow and thing's feel light within , yet other time's we may have a resistance towards it. The last is how a gas can be a lot like the mind, due to its ability to expand upon it's environment. This is something we must allow our mind's to do if we desire to understand our own internal self. There are other time's when that expansion can create a sense of scatteredness within the mind. When you look at a gas the molecule's will have seemed to separate far apart from one another. So what I'm saying, is no matter what state the mind is in we have the power, opportunity and utmost ability to bring ourself back to center, but we have to first remember that water will always be what it is and the same applies to anxiety. There is no need to change what it is, but rather our awareness, understanding and compassion is what allows us to move from one state to another.

I call this the anxiety bug.

-THE UNITY CONSCIOUS MOVEMENT